Some people need to learn how to open up to people.

As a dating expert and life coach, my works have been featured on HelloGiggles and Bustle. I understand well the struggle when it comes to revealing yourself to others. If you have approach anxiety, which you can learn more about here, I can help you with it. I'll give you tips on how to open up to people.

Let's get started!


What Does Opening Up Mean (and Why Important?)

Opening up means being honest and letting others know how you are truly feeling. Bottled-up feelings can have a negative effect on your mental health. Communicating positive and negative emotions is important to have a healthy relationship.

It can be hard for a person to open up to someone because it entails vulnerability. They fear rejection or judgment from their friends or romantic partner after telling them their thoughts. Introverts may also have a hard time because being expressive of emotion is not part of their communication process.

Opening up works both ways. You can share your thoughts and feelings with your friends or romantic partner. And in return, you allow them to do the same thing with you, leading to a deeper relationship.

How To Open Up To People

Revealing yourself to others takes time and courage. But remember, you do not have to be an open book. You can choose which ones you think is safe to share. Know the right person to whom you can share your feelings. Someone you feel comfortable and safe with, like a loved one or close friend.

Step #1: Get to know yourself and your own feelings.

Know the things that get you down and what makes you smile. Try to determine your feelings about these specific situations. You can only communicate your thoughts if you know what they are. Know the people you can open up to, those you think won't judge you. Opening up is a social skill, don't be discouraged if you can't seem to do it right away. It will be good to practice communicating your feelings with a family member or safe person. Once you feel confident, you can get out of your comfort zone and try opening up to a new friend or acquaintance.

Step #2: Work on your self-confidence.

If you are insecure, you might find it hard to open up. You need to focus on your strengths rather than your weaknesses. Nobody's perfect, and we all have our flaws, embrace yourself and what you stand for. One good practice is opening up on social media. Yes, it's different when you open up in person versus social media. But it is a good training ground. You learn to express your feelings and compose your thoughts with less fear of being judged.

Step #3: Use open body language when you talk to people.

Body language is an important part of communication; find out more on our site here. When you align your body to your words, it gives you more confidence and makes you look more approachable. Non-verbal behaviors allow you to be at ease and communicate better with others.

Maintaining eye contact shows that you are honest with your thoughts. Facial expressions also play a role when having a deep conversation. It could support or contradict your words. Keep an open posture and smile; your small talk could lead to a deep conversation.

Step #4: Be open about the pains and fears originating in your past.

It's not that easy to find interesting things to talk about; good thing you can find a great list here. One interesting topic you can open up about is your emotional pain and fears from your past. Revealing to someone about a painful experience in the past can bring you a sense of relief. You can finally let go of the difficult emotions bottled up inside you. And it can lead to a meaningful connection.

Step #5: Don't be afraid of making emotional mistakes.

Opening up is a journey, and expect some missteps. Don't be too harsh on yourself when you make a mistake; it happens. But also, be understanding when your loved one makes a mistake. Treat this as a step to understanding each other better and having a deeper relationship.

Step #6: Use "I" statements.

An important thing when you open up to people is to label your own feelings. Using "I" statements helps you put your feelings and thoughts into words. Try saying words like, ' I am happy to be here.' This gives the impression that you are confident in expressing your own thoughts.

Step #7: Look for similar interests as other people

Similar interests are good ways to start a conversation; find out more on our site here. Look for people who share common ground. You will feel more comfortable with them. It is easier to open up to someone you know who would be interested in what you're about to share.

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Take The Time You Need, Being Open About Your Feelings Is Not Easy

To some people, opening up about their feelings can be difficult. It could be affected by their experience or fear of judgment and rejection. We all have our own pace, and we should be respectful if someone is not ready to open up. What matters is to be there for them and make them feel you are there to listen without prejudice.

Sharing can benefit our relationships and well-being. Find that person whom you trust and feel comfortable with. And, little by little, try to open up so you'll find emotional relief.

Frequently Asked Questions

Learning how to open up to people will help you greatly if you want to achieve a deeper level of friendship. Here are our answers to the questions you have in mind.

Why some people are slow to open up to others?

Some people find it hard to open up to others because they do not feel emotionally safe to do so. They have a fear of being rejected or judged and so they are not comfortable sharing things about themselves. Give them a sense of welcome and openness and don't force them to share until they're ready.

Why are some people become emotionally distant?

To some people, emotional detachment is a coping mechanism for stress and anxiety. They prefer to avoid these things by not engaging emotionally with others. This can be a positive coping mechanism if temporary, but in the long run, it could be unhealthy. People, in one way or another, have to connect emotionally with other people.

How can you tell someone is closed off?

Closed-off people do not want to open up about their feelings. They often don't like intimate situations. They fear others will judge them for what they say or do. They may also seem unapproachable because they tend to keep others at bay.

What questions to ask when opening up?

Start with simple and general open-ended questions. Like, 'what would you do' questions. What would you do if you won a million dollars today? It's a light topic, nothing too serious and emotional. Let them get comfortable talking, and then you can ask follow-up questions to know them better.

More Interesting Articles To Explore

Now that you know how to open up to people, we have other interesting articles you might want to read.

  1. Are you trying to find your life purpose? Know how to figure out what you want in your life.
  2. To have a healthy relationship, you need to know how to stop being codependent.
  3. Learn how to stop overthinking in a relationship to have a happy relationship.


Meaningful relationships come with open communication. Now that you know how to open up to people, practice sharing your thoughts and feelings with your partner.

Be confident, and don't fear putting your thoughts into words. This is just one way to let people know who you are.